Existential Circles

Paul laying on the stage at MUCCC
Paul laying on the stage at MUCCC

I wiki’d “existentialism” because I was quite sure I was having an existential crisis. Kierkegaard maintained that the individual solely has the responsibilities of giving one’s own life meaning and living that life passionately and sincerely, in spite of many existential obstacles and distractions including despair, angst, absurdity, alienation, and boredom.

I painted all day yesterday and went around in circles. The world does not need another painting, I don’t need another painting but I want to do a painting that works. I would get a kick out of that.

Today, we stopped in at Deb Jones’ 40th Birthday Mexican Brunch and talked to Steve Grills about a funky little place out on 441 called Cary Lake. 1940’s style, combination party house and bar, f-u-N-k-y. He payed there with his band and loved it. Iggy Pop’s new album was on. It didn’t sound so adventurous. Iggy can do what ever he wants. I thought it was going to be wilder.

Then headed over get to MuCCC to play a set at a memorial event for Steve Letkauskas, a friend of Bob’s. Steve’s brother, Tom, said, “Time showed kindness and grace when it ushered Steve into the the warm embrace of eternity.”I bought my djembe and played that and we did some pretty cool dirges. Peggi took this photo after the event.

6 Comments

6 Replies to “Existential Circles”

  1. Keirkegaard also had a lot to say about the different ways of comportment to the universe that there are for giving ones life meaning (in a universe that is, for all intents and purposes, absurd, which is something we should all probably just agree on at this point):

    The first is to treat life as a series of sequential experiences, and basically progress through that sequence trying to explore the most interesting/fun/exciting possibilities. This is called the “aesthetic” lifestyle – basically trying to keep yourself from getting bored and keep yourself out of pain.

    Secondly, you can find something or someone to live for, and do that. This is called “the Ethical”, because that’s what you gain by taking this up as a project – a standard by which to judge right and wrong. For example, when you’re single, you live for yourself (living the life of an aesthete). But then you get married, and take up an ethics. You are now a person who lives to maintain this “marriage”, like a job that you hold from the core of your being. Things are “Right” when they are in harmony with the idea of a marriage, and “wrong” when they threaten the health of the marriage (that’s if you are living ethically, with the marriage as your ethics).
    Having children is an even better representation of an ethics, because children have a tangible, physical form, whereas a marriage is still an abstract idea you choose to take or up (which is why its easier to abandon a marriage than to abandon your children). If you have a child, you are responsible for his or her wellness (physical, spiritual, whatever). That’s why no matter what you believe about politics, or whatever, if something is hurting your child, it is WRONG, and if something is making your child truly happy (without hurting him or her), it is RIGHT. end of discussion. This is why politicians can vote for wars but not want to send their children to fight in them (which doesn’t make it any less hypocritical).

    The third way of living that Kierkegaard suggests is to find God, which is such a beautiful entity that you can even sacrifice your Ethics, should God require it. Basically, you become like Abraham – a servant of a power so glorious and better-than-everything-else that if it should require you to kill your own child, you take Isaac up the mountain and get your knife out.

    I always take this advice with what Hegel said – that the universe is absurd, and that the two available perspectives on absurdity are tragedy or comedy. The people who are happy are those who can find comedy in the absurdity, using whatever means they can. If that requires just doing something to keep yourself from getting bored (painting to see if you can make one that actually “works”), or taking up an ethics (realizing that the world actually does need another painting, and the painting they need is one that only you can paint, regardless of whether you think it “works” or not), or finding God (to the point where if God told you to set your favorite painting on fire, you’d do it), whether or not God actually exists.

    The tough part is that the universe probably isn’t going to make any more sense from here on out, because at the end of the day, it just is, and it is this. It could have been any other possible universe, or no universe at all, but its this one, for no good reason. That’s tough, but also pretty fucking funny, if you think about it.

    Sorry for writing a small novel here. I just figure that since I just got a degree in philosophy, and have nothing to do with it, I might as well use it when it seems like it could be used.

  2. i don’t know how to top youse guys intellectually except to say that as one gets older and wiser one seems to be able to get drunk and just pass out instead of all that puking and praying to the john god that the less experienced seem to have to suffer thru.

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